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08-12-2008, 06:50 PM
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VENT
Ugh, I seriously have been doing SO freaking good with not being upset when I see a pregnant lady... or when I find out one of my friends are pregnant..
But, I swear it's getting harder and harder.. and at this point, I can't even confide in DH about it, because he's taking it hard too! A good portion of my friends are currently pregnant... and I try so hard to be happy for them , but I also feel like it's not fair.. Not only do I have to go through all this Cancer Crap, I have to worry if I'll ever be a mama... YUCK! I hate it. I gotta go, I just got myself pretty worked up, and I feel sick. Thanks for the vent.
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08-12-2008, 08:15 PM
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I'm new here, but I wanted to say I'm sorry for all that you're dealing with. It took over 3 years for me to get pregnant with my first...and now that she's here the pain has just melted away. Infertility sucks, but I pray that you have your healing in the way of a sweet little baby in your arms soon!
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08-12-2008, 09:11 PM
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I TOTALLY get you! My sister in law is preggo (not even a year after meeting my brother in law) and she is only 20. She is SUPER immature and hates all of us because we think they are moving way too fast. Anyway, I completely understand - I even have to change the channel if there is something about pregnancy on tv. My DH is also really sensitive about it too, so we can't evn talk about it. I haven't really had time to reply to your posts about your DH but I wanted to say good luck to you guys. I really hope that you can get the care that he needs. Stay strong!
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08-12-2008, 10:11 PM
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Thank you very much.
It sucks because I am 21. And, I think a lot of my friends who are pregnant now, are pretty immature... and to see them pregnant, while we're struggling sucks... I never used to think this way, but I kind of do now... but I believe you should be married to have kids... lol, oddly enough said, my mother has never been married.. but I know how it feels so I guess that's why.. and NONE of my friends who are pregnant, are married.. or Hhave they been in long term relationships... I think the longest is 2 years, which isn't bad.. but they;ve been on again off again.. I don't understand how I can feel so jealous I HATE IT! Thank you so much Whips. It's good to have someone really get me.. normally I have just one friend who I can let loose on, and I feel bad sometimes.. because she's gone through horrible losses, so I feel for her more than myself.
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08-13-2008, 02:26 PM
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Oh hun.......  I cant start to know how it feels to be where you with dealing with all you have had to deal with lately but I do know the pain of wanting a child so bad you cant stand it. We have been trying now for a long time and I have had my bad days. Those days when I found myself crying in the shower so that my DH couldnt tell I had been crying. Seeing pregnant women and wanting to be them and thinking why cant that be me? These days I just dont think about it to much I figure why torture myself its to hard on us to keep thinking about it besides I have been to busy with other things to even have time to think about it . I know how bad you want a baby and I totally understand your hurt and pain and yes the jealousy dont feel bad about feeling jealous we all feel that way somedays its normal. Just remember we are ALL here for you. God Bless you and your DH  and heres to brighter days.... 
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08-14-2008, 09:07 AM
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Hey Sweetie. I just want you to know that I read your post and I am right there with you. I feel like such a bad person when the jealousy kicks in, but it is so hard not to feel that way sometimes. It is sad that wanting something so beautiful can make us so bitter at times. I wish you and DH the best!!!!
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08-15-2008, 11:14 PM
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 for you. It took us a little over 6 yrs if I remember right to concieve my ds Brenden. So I know what you are going through. You want to scream at the top of your lungs that is not fair that others get pregnant right away or they get pg and don't want to be.  I hate having those kind of feelings it hurts. hoping for the best.
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